Listen Up: Mastering the Art of Tuned-In Dating

Last updated
September 7, 2023
minutes to read
Listen Up: Mastering the Art of Tuned-In Dating

Active listening is an underrated skill that makes a big impact.

If you’re looking for a way to set yourself apart from other men in dating, look no further.

In a world full of noise and distractions, mastering the ability to actively listen to your date makes all the difference.

However, doing so can be easier said than done. Let’s look at some tips that can help you become a better listener and improve your dating game.


Be Present

When you’re having a conversation, shut out distractions around you as much as possible. Turn off the TV, put your phone away, and give her your undivided attention. If you find your mind wandering, quickly direct yourself back to the conversation. Focus on your partner and what they’re saying. 

Restate and Repeat

Repeating back what the person said to you is a way to show you’re picking up what they’re putting down. If you aren’t sure you understand what is being said, restate it back and ask if it’s correct. For example, “What I’m hearing is your friend hurt your feelings by not calling you back, is that correct?”. This serves the dual purpose of showing you care enough to clarify and that you’re really listening. 

Pay Attention to Your Body Language

Body language can convey messages, both intentional and unintentional. Crossing your arms, looking around the room, or checking your watch shows disinterest or boredom. Maintain direct eye contact, nod your head, and use calm hand gestures. This will help her know that you’re paying attention and can even help you absorb the information more effectively

Don’t Interrupt

Allow the person to finish speaking before you start. Interrupting shows disregard for what is being said and is just plain rude. Resist the urge to jump in with your thoughts, opinions, or advice. Wait until they’ve reached a natural stopping point to speak up. It can also be helpful to ask if she wants advice or just wants to vent. Express empathy for what they’re going through.

Ask Open Ended Questions

Instead of asking “Did you have a good day?”, ask “How was your day?”. Asking questions in a way that doesn’t allow for yes or no answers shows you care about the answer. Plus they keep the conversation flowing more naturally. It opens the door for deeper conversation and more detailed information. 

Practice and Practice Some More

Active listening is a skill. Like any other skill, it takes practice to become better at it. The benefits of active listening don’t just apply to dating and relationships. This will help you in your family relationships, friendships, and even at work. Be aware of what parts of this skill you need to improve on the most. Be patient with yourself and keep trying. Active listening isn’t just about proving you’re a good listener. It helps you forge deeper connections and form meaningful relationships.

Wrap up & next steps

So remember, as you step into the dating arena, active listening is your secret weapon.

Intentionally create an environment where your date feels heard, understood, and valued. This sets the stage for genuine and deeper connections.

So, tune in, focus on improving your listening skills, and elevate your dating game to new heights.

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